Procrastination. It's a huge problem for me. I'm procrastinating RIGHT NOW so that I don't study for the GRE or at least go work out, or even wash a few dishes. I actually have to go down to Houston for a small bit. I want to see the parents as much as I can. But, I have so much to do.
All this procrastination is really stopping me from living my life. My all the suck things that are happening are due to the fact that I'm stopping myself. Somehow, I'm stopping myself from really doing what I want to do. This is awful. Let's get this done.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
The Dreamscape
I had a chock full of dreams last night. It was amazing. I remember most of them pretty well. One of them was about some kind of rush to go somewhere or do something that had to do with my cousin and her husband. In my dream they weren't married yet but about to be and there was some urgency. But we all ended up getting into a red car and traveling somewhere. Later on, I get out of the car and I am greeted by a really old friend. Probably one of my oldest friends from pre-kindergarten. He goes to my college now but we've drifted so far apart we can only be classified as strangers now. It makes me a bit sad but after a long time I've come to terms with it more or less. In the dream he's a car attendant and he doesn't recognize me. We get along really well and catch up on everything. It was nice. It's just odd to see him as a car attendant washing the car, etc since he's really well-dressed these days and everything. It felt as if we could one day be the best of friends again, but at the same time it felt like it would never happen since both of us were still ultimately strangers to each other in the dream.
The most memorable dream I had that night was with my now deceased grandpa and I think my grandma as well. It was actually the first of my dreams. Up till now I had never had a dream of him. It was kind of just what I needed though, because all we were doing was spending time with each other. The house we were in was their old house, but it was strangely illuminated by only one singular light so the rest of the house was swathed in degrees of darkness and shadow. At the same time it wasn't scary but warm and comforting. For a small moment it felt so real and it made me extremely happy that I was reunited with them and I could have that last talk with them that I neglected to have with them before. It is rather unusual for me to feel great waves of happiness or emotion in a dream. In retrospect, I'm not sure why it took me so long to realize it was all a dream because somewhere in that particular dream I saw gramps guest star on Sesame Street. He was in costume as a homeless man. He looked like Oscar, from Arrested Development. Identical to this picture.
So yeah, it was a dream. But it was a good one. A dream sequence that made me think and cause me to take a few moments out of my day and just look back on my life. Interesting.
The most memorable dream I had that night was with my now deceased grandpa and I think my grandma as well. It was actually the first of my dreams. Up till now I had never had a dream of him. It was kind of just what I needed though, because all we were doing was spending time with each other. The house we were in was their old house, but it was strangely illuminated by only one singular light so the rest of the house was swathed in degrees of darkness and shadow. At the same time it wasn't scary but warm and comforting. For a small moment it felt so real and it made me extremely happy that I was reunited with them and I could have that last talk with them that I neglected to have with them before. It is rather unusual for me to feel great waves of happiness or emotion in a dream. In retrospect, I'm not sure why it took me so long to realize it was all a dream because somewhere in that particular dream I saw gramps guest star on Sesame Street. He was in costume as a homeless man. He looked like Oscar, from Arrested Development. Identical to this picture.
So yeah, it was a dream. But it was a good one. A dream sequence that made me think and cause me to take a few moments out of my day and just look back on my life. Interesting.
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