NOW, It's the New Year

            Being Asian and all, today is a pretty big deal. Why is that??? Because it's the Freakin CHINESE NEW YEAR. It makes me happy for obvious reasons. The food is usually the main stimulus, but the opportunity to spend time with the family and carry out age old traditions during the new year are also a big plus. Usually me and the family have a grand feast of home cooked chinese food together and then vegetate in the living room. This year was no exception. However, this year was a little different because we paid homage to our ancestors by burning fake money and incense in our house before we ate. We also offered them wine and food and setup everything in a special way. It was just interesting to see. Every year we would usually do such homage at my grandparent's house but since they died we moved it to mine. It's just a little strange to see life go on without them, especially during events they usually took charge of like the traditions of Chinese New Year. However, things are exponentially better than last year. This time a year ago I was so swamped with work I couldn't even come, and my grandparents had just died and I broke open my chin and broke my wrist in a bike accident and it was horrifyingly freezing. This year everything felt fine and the weather was absolutely gorgeous. A good amount of time today was spent talking to my parents about a number of things and just lying around together on our couches. If anything those are the moments I really cherish. Sure we laid around like a sack of potatoes but that was part of what made that moment for me. It's back to reality for me, but it was a pretty good day today. Just too bad the rest of the world treats this as another ordinary day.

-C.C.

Hilariously Unproductive Procrastination

       Do you ever look back on your mistakes and become astounded by how ridiculous you were being? That was me today. I actually did what I set out to do, so I'm going to give myself a great big Bravo. However, I also took around seven hours to actually get around to doing the infernal thing, but of course that was only a small part of what I really have to do. Technically, I haven't really started any essays or what not. I had to go on facebook and then surf youtube the rest of the time. You know, all those other obligations. To be fair, I've been nerding out and watching as many pirated episodes of Justice League and Teen Titans and Young Justice and any movies that feature gay romance. You know, all the things that will indicate I will be FOREVER ALONE. For that I'm giving myself a slow, sarcastic clap to accompany that Bravo. And what am I working so diligently on? My graduate school application. Yep, I'm a born winner. Oh, but fear not, because I still have to study for a few quizzes and prepare a presentation by next week. So, in hindsight, I definitely swore that I would never do this to myself again this year. I'm probably going to just go ahead and give myself a slow sarcastic clap for that endeavor as well just in case.
       In other news, I've finally decided that I'll try and do something with Red. Just casually send him a text and see if he'll bite. I think I'm probably going to regret it. I mean, he did randomly try and hook up with me all sleazy like and therefore leave a lingering distaste for him in my head, but I'm young and kinda horny and he seems like a nice guy maybe??? There was that one time he texted me to fool around in a restroom too. And really all that stuff turns me off. If he just asked me out on a date, no matter how awful he was, I'd be more inclined at least. I'm just not that kind of guy...I don't know, but I keep on thinking about him and stalking his facebook. I just can't get him out of my head. I just want him to do stuff to me. The thing is, I'm sure he's not really right for me but there might be a chance he is. Maybe? I need to get out more...and go to bed. I'm sick of this. All of this.

-C.C.
     

I've got time

       Classes are ridiculously tiring. Especially when I haven't had my nine hours of sleep. GAWD, why is my life sooooo hard. Man do I sound like a brat, but in all honesty I was really tired today. The classes I had today were less than fantastic today, especially the lab I had. It was a simple review of the protocols lab that we did. However, I felt like such a dunce because I was the last guy to finish everything and to top it all off I royally screwed some of my results. I'm one of those guys. You might have seen my kind. The one that looks really lost in class and lo and behold he kind of gets through class only after leaving behind a wake of frustration and annoyance to his peers or superiors. That guy. Man, if only I was less careless, but for some reason I really am careless to the point of negligence. Oh, and by the way I totes want to be a doctor so please do place yourself under my care. On the up side I have an attractive scruffy TA and there's a cute guy that sits near me in the lab. Truthfully my cute classmate is more of a short, baby-faced, kind of chubby, extremely scruffy sort of guy. He looks kind of like a baby-faced hobbit. That's more like it. But for some reason I really think he's cute. Doesn't that beat all? I guess scruff is a real turn on for me. Maybe because I can't grow any of my own being Asian and all? That's funny. I also keep on ogling at the scruffy TA but he is married so every time I think about him I feel like a sleezebag.
      Besides my debacle in the science lab I went home and kind of did nothing. I have no plans, although I'm going back home for Chinese New Year, which is always a wonderful celebration. I'm a little perturbed I don't have plans or any friends in mind to go spend time with right now. I actually have quite a bit of time on my hands. It's wonderful, but kind of unsettling. However, I still haven't finished my grad school applications or made any progress so really I'm still a mess. Fantastic. But I am slightly tired, so perhaps sleeping will be the next course of action for me. Probably. I never did like taking care of my responsibilities anyway.

-C.C.

I'm getting there?

       The thing I'm most proud of is working out today. I did a great job trying to tire myself out. My day was pretty sweet in that regard. I'm also qualified for a chemistry minor and that was also exciting. On a less gratifying note I kind of bullshitted the rest of the day from seven until midnight. I just can't fathom how I can simply drain five hours of my life in one sitting so easily these days. It's almost second nature. It's scary. I guess I know I'm really in college now. Gotdangit.
       In other news, I saw my very first crush at the gym today. He goes to my university, but I almost never see him. Anyway, it was just interesting to see him because of the amazing stache and beard that he was sporting. He used to have this quirky gait. It wasn't abnormal, just different. It seemed to portray somebody unsure about themselves. I wondered how he had changed, and then I wondered how I have changed over the years. Some things are radically different, and some things still aren't. Like my awful self destructive habits for instance haha...but no seriously. In any case, at least I'm making some progress, but I know I have so much more to go. And of course, 2012 is going to be my year to REALLY change things and make it different. I just want them to be. At the same time, I sound like such a broken record already...man.

-C.C.